SUNFLOWER: Fuck, that sucks. Hate that shit. Guys’re such jealous pricks, too. “You spend more time talking to that Troy guy than you do to me?” Yeah, maybe because YOU ran out of things to talk about after your car and football; and HE’S been my best friend since before I could say his name, when he was still “Toy” and I was still “Joowie,” and we never run out of stuff to talk about.Julie lit a cigarette as she waited for his reply.MATH BOY: Yeah, I know. “Why’re you always talking to that girl who shares your interests? Why don’t you want to constantly listen to me go on about reality shows and those bitches at work and somebody who minorly inconvenienced me today? And listen to the extra snotty, nasal voice I use when I repeat my version of what they said? What’ve you two got going on?”MATH BOY: YES, my best friend has girl parts, and sure, her breasts are great; NO, that does not automatically mean that we’re fucking!SUNFLOWER: IKR! I mean, I even catch you glancing at them now. “You girls cause me to jerk off whenever you are here together for a sleepover.”Vanessa said, “I love you Daddy, but you’re lying.”I swallowed hard and said, “I’m serious. You three girls drive me absolutely crazy. When you have a sleepover I have to go to my bedroom to stop myself from molesting you girls.”Vanessa said, “Do you really jerk off to thoughts of me?”I replied, “That is not an appropriate question to ask your own father.”Vanessa giggled and said, “You do, don’t you. Otherwise you would have said no.”I must have turned every shade of red possible.Then Vanessa said, “Can I invite my girlfriends over for the weekend? It’s Friday and you would have forty-eight hours to convince me that you are telling me the truth about liking big beautiful teenagers.”I stammered out, “But you girls are only thirteen and I’m thirty-nine. That is a total of all of your ages put together. That’s wrong and I can go to jail.”Vanessa said, “I won’t tell anyone, I swear.”I asked, “What about Tina.
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